We're In, We're Out, We're Shaken All About
By Half-Wit Henry

Greetings, friends, Half-Wit Henry here with the ‘heads up’ on some potential and actual changes in the Sturdy Beggar world coming up for the 2004 season.

First of all there’s some good news for you fans in the Southeastern portion of the good ol’ USA. In 2003 we started to tap into that area by planting the 2-man troupe of Fitzhugh Nicely and Spunky Jitters at the North Carolina Festival (of which a jolly report by Spunky can be found elsewhere in this damn Muddy Rag). Well, wouldn’t you know, one day the management team of the Georgia Faire just happened to catch the lads performance in NC and next thing you know conversations are happening, ideas are expressed, and agreements are struck. Yes, I belabor the obvious no longer – the Sturdy Beggars Mud Show® will be performing at the Georgia Renaissance Festival in 2004! It will be a two man show which at one time or another will feature Fitzhugh, Spunky, Privy LePew and meself. We are VERY psyched to add GRF to our line-up and will endeavor to bring the mostest funniest possiblest show to that previously denied realm.

This happy addition couldn’t help but make me think about what a funny ol’ world this is, and how what goes around will come around and how hey, you just never know, do you, know what I mean? You see, this is not our first go-round with the GRF. We were there for their inaugural season in 1986 and for the next four seasons after that. In fact, our connection with Georgia’s owner, Jack Sias, predates event that… in the early ‘80’s Jack owned food booths at the Maryland Renaissance Festival and used to drop off unsold steaks at our camp site. We tend to like people who give us free food; thank you, Jack!

One may wonder, then, why we stopped working at GRF after 1990. Rest assured I really won’t answer that question other than to say, well, sometimes things just happen to fall a certain way, and that’s how it goes, and hey whatta you gonna do? In a sense, since we will be performing there again, does it even matter why we once didn’t? I’m just elated to get to see friends and fans, both old and new, at GRF in ’04.

I only mention all this because I have some potential bad news for our fans in the Northeastern portion of this fine land. Weird and disquieting things have been happening in Tuxedo, NY, home of the New York Renaissance Festival. Things that I am not at liberty to discuss in any real way, other than to point out that (a) yes, our request in this e-newsletter for an intellectual property lawyer is related to this unsettlingly bizarrity emanating from the NYRF, and (b) well sometimes things just happen to fall a certain way, that’s how it goes, and hey whatta you gonna do?

I’m sure said lawyer would advise me not to discuss any of this at all, and so on advice of phantom counsel, I will not. I will however drop 5 facts and leave their interpretation open to you, my friends. I’m sure a proper course of action will suggest itself.

Fact one – When you entertain as many people in a day as we do at the Mud Show®, you can’t expect everyone who sees the show to “get it.”
Fact two – When you entertain as many people in a day as we do, it is possible that some people might, in fact, hate our show. Hate it enough to write letters of complaint to management.
Fact three – There is a general theory of Business Management that each letter of complaint received is equal to several hundred letters of complaint never mailed.
Fact four – In fact, that theory is bunkum, because people who love something are less inclined to write letters -- if they’re happy with things the way they are, they see no reason to write. One letter of complaint is actually equal to several hundred letters of praise never written.
Fact five – Management will pay more attention to the letters they get than the ones they don’t.

And that’s how the mud-pie crumbles. Ain’t politix grand? Keep ‘em flyin’, friends and strangers, and stranger friends, beam good thoughts our way and we’ll reciprocate in kind. See you around!

(Editors note: as of March, 2004, we have been officially informed by the Creative Director of the New York Renaissance Festival that the Sturdy Beggars will not be rehired, he’s “going in a totally different direction,” and that’s “NON-NEGOTIABLE.” Sigh and c’est la vie… well, we’ve left and returned to that Fest a coupla times already in our storied history, so you know what? Creative Directors come and go, but our show endures. Au revoir.)